Happy Ramzan…

Happy Ramzan.

We are introducing my almost 5-year-old son to the holy month of Ramzan this year. He knows other festivals of India – won’t stop saying “Ganapati bappa moria” much to my embarrassment in front of my Muslim in-laws.He knows that Diwali is the time for diya, rangoli and crackers and Holi is all about colors and water.

He can even recognize Santa Claus and won’t stop singing Jingle bell, jingle bell – again to my embarrassment. By the way, I don’t know why am embarrassed. my in-laws are lovely people. 

So we told him that this is the holiest month and he has to be a good boy. Sharing, caring and helping others.I write down all his good deeds in a diary daily and will show it to the Almighty Allah at the end of the month on Eid. If he finishes his meal, that counts too.

And in return, Allah will give him a gift on Eid. A big wonderful gift. A super-cool gift. It could be a supercar or a giant dinosaur. It could even be the spiderman figurine. How wonderful is that?

And the same goes for all of us. We get a nice gift if we behave well.

So this is how it goes at my home now…

“Mummy, what if Allah sleeps before I finish my meal, he wouldn’t know?” Allah, if you are listening, Aadil usual dinner time is 8-9 PM. Please do not sleep before 9. Nevertheless, I have the diary.

“What if Allah runs out of the gift and none is left for me ?” OMG! That would be scandalous..for all the pain the boy has taken in the month. 

“Mummy, You are shouting – you will not get any gift.”  Allah- You are all knowing and wise, you made me shout/scream… I did not. I deserve the gift.

“Papa, you are not playing with me – you will not get any gift.” Yes (raised fist) That will serve him right Allah, no gift for him.

All in all, am happy with the way Ramzan is going and I can’t wait to see the big smile on his face on the day of Eid when he gets his present (from Allah.)

Happy Ramzan everyone! I hope you may all celebrate this holy month by sharing, caring, and helping.

4 years 4 month
This was the pic taken when he turned 4 years, 4 month and 4 days, when we celebrated his Bismillah ceremony. I was so nervous that he is not gonna repeat the verses read out to him, but he did! Without any fuss, he sat through it and made be really proud that day.
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When God wants , he just wants . He is quite stubborn that way!

The plan was great.. Sort of foolproof.

It was simple and it was based on facts , truth , stories and folklore and human behavior.

Husband and I , are made  for each other. And also  made of bones   lazy bones and flesh. If we could have our way , I will be reading , sleeping and fishing all day , all year long and he would , well (pause) , he would never ever even lift his finger.

PS : If you would ask him , he, of course, would deny , but remember you are my friend , not his. Whom would you trust ? Me or Him? If you said Him , Congratulations! You made it to my send-hitmen-to-hit list!

Moving ahead,

Like I said. We had planned it well. I always wanted a child. One who would be ours. My eyes , definitely my nose and his voice (only) . He will grow up to be a smart , handsome and very very resourceful boy.

Scene 1 : Me and husband watching TV , Need to change the channel , but remote is on the table at the far corner.

Me : Adi , Pass me that remote .

Adi will run , the boy wanna impress me with his speed. He will feel proud that I asked him something. He will rush , bring me the remote and I can see accomplishment in his eyes. Husband and I will clap Good Boy and hail him hero!

Doesn’t all 4-year-old love that? No kidding ! That is a fact.

Haven’t you ever asked any kid to open a water bottle? He will do it with pleasure.  And with more than one 4-year-old , there is a possibility of a riot, each vying for my attention and bring me my desire.

Scene 2 : Am reading , the window is open and the breeze is cool. I feel cold. Perhaps one should switch off the fan.hmm , I wonder who could help me with that?

Adi will run and boy !Am impressed …My Bolt.

This is his one growing phase  , I wish he would never grow out. I wish and it is my husband’s wish too. He is just waiting for the time when he can ask him to bring remote , water bottle , handle switches blah blah blah.

Meanwhile , up above the sky , God was listening. He understood us. He knew what we wanted. He had the exact kid in mind. He was happy to send him to us and we were thrilled to receive him!

Now the Reality.

Scene 2 : Am reading , the window is open and the breeze is cool. I feel cold. Perhaps one should switch off the fan.hmm , I wonder who could help me with that?

Me : Adi, please switch off the fan.

Adi who is playing just a hand away from fan switch , just few inches away  will look up and .

Adi (with curious eyes) : Why mummy ?

Me : coz its cold.

Adi ( with more curiosity): Why is it, cold mummy ?

Me : coz it’s breezy . The window is open. See kitni achi hawa

Adi (with the look of wtf) : Why is the window open?

Me : Coz I left it open? (I hope that will shut him up)

Adi (then it is clearly not my problem look) : Why did you leave it open ?

Me : I did not , but then if you would just reach out .. it is one in the middle.

Adi ( Are you insane) : But you just said you did. Why did you say so?

Me ( Did I say that ? ) : Ahem ahem .. I did say that because I thought ….that .. now it is the one in the middle. It is very breezy .. if you would just.

Adi (I have to get to the bottom of this issue) : What were you thinking mummy ?

….

After 10 minutes and 100 questions later .

I get up and switch off the fan. Yes , the one in the middle.

Meanwhile , up above the sky , God is feeling slightly more proud than he should be. If you ask me !

Thatsmyboy

 

 

How did scene 1 end in reality ? Don’t even get me started unless you are home and am watching TV and I need YOU to pass remote …

Grrrrrrr God ,

wehadadeal

 

PS: All images from google image search. Thank you letting me use!

I want twins …..sure?

2012:

We want twins . We always wanted twins. I have to do something may be eat 2 banana, eat 2 chapati .. everything in multiplication of 2.

Shall we ask doctor if it’s possible somehow ?

I read somewhere women who conceive after certain age are most likely to have twins. Shall we postpone ?

Oh , How I wish I have twins! Let’s check out cloning?

Me : Why can’t you teach your swimmers to join hands and end up in a draw ! .. I  really really wanna have twins..

Iwannatwins

 

But Alas , Life is not a freaking wish granting factory!

Doc , Are you sure .. look closely ..their might be another egg and sperm trying out ?

My sister has twins

Am so happy , at least someone has twins…she is so lucky!

sheislucky

My sister comes home with her year old twins named L and K

L sleeps at 2000 , K at 2300. L wakes up at 600  and K at 1000. Each child takes turn to wake up every 2 hours.

L likes cerelac for breakfast , K likes his meal less mushy. Two breakfasts.

L is playing with red car. K wants the very same red car at the very same moment. One screams , other is crazily happy seeing bro scream!

L pees , then K pees and then L poos and then K poos. And then L needs to pee again. And then it is bath time , one after another.

K is playing with his favorite toy when L wants mommy. Then contagiously K also wants mommy. Mommy wants to pee but who cares!

After  2 days , sister goes back with her twins.

Me , husband finally : Yay ! We do not have twins! 

thankgod
Google.

“Bach gaye”!

 

Europe : The weather God is crazy !

In India, we have learned that there are 7 seasons in a year. It’s a cycle followed in a year . Fruits , veggies , travel plan ,dress code all preparation is according to season.. Even the mood changes according to how is it outside.

Now based on my experience with Nordic – what do kids at Nordic learn – 4 seasons in a day !

Yes ! Nordics weather God is crazy ! He just cannot make up his mind , whether to empty his bucket of rain , or send some chill down or let kid enjoy with snow or provide room for sun shine or throw in some wind , chilli wind! , So from heavy rain in the morning it could go to quite a sunny day by afternoon and again cloudy in evening.

Am afraid to ask him about his thoughts on “what should be today’s temperature? “- I guess if he comes to know that temperature could even go up to 50 in some part of world, he just might be tempted to try it at .. say up north ..Norway and then I don’t want to imagine what it would be like when all that water from melted snow will come our way . He seems like a very very creative God , one who experiments everyday.

yeah , I know am talking crazy 🙂 but I was really surprised  at first when I came to know that there is no rainy season in nordic . It could rain anytime , anytime their God feels like , FYI – Nordic God – Its called Monsoon 🙂 The month when you could empty your bucket of water.. when people will know your mood and carry umbrella every time .  You could definitely check with our God of Rain – Indra .. its his full time job to focus on rains.

Well , on the other hand it feels like Indian God is lazy , damn lazy fellow !  he just publishes his calendar for season and then just take the whole year off ! Perhaps If I ask him , he would say he is busy at other dept- “You Indians keep me busy all the time – there are a billion of you! “. Not sure I see any change in any other department -we are still poor ,  still into corruption , chaotic traffic etc etc.. not much changes there . So WTH is he doing ?

Ah , may be he is busy reading our wishes .. so many people , so obviously he needs time to read wishes. I really see he needs a huge gigantic server space to store all our wishes.. Should try opening a datacenter in iceland – cooling comes free – provided by Nordic god of weather:)

So whatever -he keeps his mind off pity things like ‘ hmm what should I send down today? ‘ Oh Boy ! How I wish my days were like that ..  I have to think everyday what to cook ! Every freaking day.. How I wish I had a calendar or better yet a machine to dole out all dishes and delicacies according to calendar/menu. So I can focus on something else ..something more serious like Sleeping , napping or fooling !

There are some perks too..

  1. You can shop anytime of year! So don’t think , just go ahead and buy that nice looking sweater anytime or buy sandal during winter and no one will notice!

  2. God is crazy , but MET Dept not. They do take their responsibility very very seriously , make up for craziness of their God. I can easily check  online what is the weather. And you know people are very confident about it. When I was there and it was raining , my friend checked online and very confidently said – Rain is gonna stop at 6 in evening. Wow! I check MET at India.. its gonna rain and I will be sure it’s not gonna rain today 😉

  3. There is one common thing that unites all , is starting for small talk..weather talk. All meeting begin with “Its sunny today ” or “It snowed 10mm today , how is it there?” . In fact I check the temperature before starting any online meeting. Anyone can ask .. “Yeah yeah – its nice today , Monsoon , temp around 25 degrees ..” [PS: You see usually we don’t keep track of weather as in number – Yes its sunny or rain .. don’t care of exact temperature..]

4 This crazy God , prepares you for anything , come what may – Rain or Shine .. literally! So mothers are better in packing for their kids .. you don’t have to think what to pack .. just pack all !

  1. Easy for kids – you never ever have to check seasonal fruit or what season is in Dec 🙂 or Do they ?

Poor Nordic God – must be tough for you .. One God managing all ! learn from us – we have 330 millions God 🙂

So next time you are visiting Europe ,you know how to start a conversation .. !